Ghosts That We Knew
by AvrilBurkhart
Summary: Spoilers for 3x23. This story is for the beautiful, brave, fierce, and kind Allison Argent who was taken way before her time. Slight AU for Stiles/Allison relationship. I'm just having a lot of emotions right now and had to write something.


**A/N:** So, as I expected, that episode was tragic. I never thought Allison was going to die for one second and when she did, I'm not going to lie because I usually don't cry over many characters when they die, only if they mean something to me, and I cried for Allison. I had to write something about her or for her, whichever way you choose to look at it, and I cried a little bit while writing this. It mentions a bit of everyone dealing with the grief, but mainly Stiles. I hope you guys like this story and Allison Argent will be dearly missed. RIP Allison Argent. :[

* * *

_RIP Allison Argent, Beloved Daughter and Friend, You will be dearly missed._

Stiles read those words on her grave over and over again, he still couldn't absorb that Allison was gone. When he wasn't here sitting by her actual resting place, it felt like Allison was just away for a while, not gone forever. But then he would see the pain in Scott and Lydia's eyes, he would catch his father watching him as if he were about to shatter, he would see Allison's dad on the verge of either bursting into tears or trying to find something to kill as if it would bring his daughter back. There was no coming back however, Stiles knew that, he held her when she died and saw the life leave her beautiful brown eyes, he could still remember that night and he knew he always would. Stiles had to run through what had happened just a night or two before she died, remembering her when she was most alive was the only thing that kept him from falling apart when he remembered her death.

* * *

He knew the Nogitsune had brought him there to Allison's door, he could feel it taking him there and he fought it every step of the way, he didn't want it to hurt Allison, he had hurt enough people he cared about, he didn't want to hurt her too. But the Nogitsune made him knock on the door and then…it was gone, well not gone but no longer present, it had stepped aside to let Stiles be himself. When Allison opened the door he could have warned her, said the Nogitsune lead him here for who knows what reason, that he could easily lose control and she would get hurt, but none of those words came to mind when he saw her. She had been crying, her eyes still filled with tears and red-rimmed, there was also something else there in her eyes, _worry_.

"_Stiles_," Allison said with such relief, she wiped the tears from her eyes and hugged him tight with a smile.

"How do you know it's me?" Stiles asked her as he wrapped his arms around her and buried his face into her dark brown hair, taking in the wonderful scent she always had that was somewhere along the lines of cherry blossoms. He never knew if it was her perfume, her hair, or just her natural scent, but it didn't matter to him because the smell of cherry blossoms reminded him that the girl he loved was with him.

"You think I can't tell by now when you're you and when you're not?" Allison asked, breaking the hug and looking up at him with a smile. "When you're you, you have light in your eyes, when _he's_ you, it's like there's nothing there."

"He's still here, he stepped aside, I don't know why, I don't know what he's planning but he brought me here. I should probably leave-"

"I'm not letting you go anywhere." Allison said with such authority that for a moment, Stiles thought she was going to handcuff herself to him.

"Allison…me staying here could be exactly what he wants. He might want to hurt you or torture you or-"

Stiles was cut off again, but this time by Allison's lips, her kiss was soft and sweet at first and Stiles still knew he should leave. But when she grabbed him by his shirt and pulled him closer to her to deepen the kiss, he knew then he couldn't leave. He didn't remember when that door was shut, or when they got to her room, most of that night was just a blur of firsts for Stiles and while the details were a bit fuzzy, he would never really forget that night.

But then the morning came all to soon and Stiles could feel the Nogitsune sinking back in as if he had never left at all. He remembered cuffing Allison's foot to the bed and leaving before she woke, he could start to see what the Nogitsune was planning and he tried to fight it, but he was just glad it seemed to be leaving Allison out of that plan, at least for now.

* * *

Then he remembered that night, the night that was forever etched into his memory. He was himself again, the Nogitsune was there facing them all with the Oni at his side, Lydia was still lost somewhere in the building and he was sure Scott was trying to save her. Isaac and Kira were fighting off the Oni as best as they could with Allison and Stiles was trying to keep himself from going unconscious, he was fighting every second of it at the Nogitsune watched him with a smile on his face that sent chills down his spine. Though the Nogitsune wore his face, he could see now what Allison had meant, he looked different; there was nothing in his eyes, no spark of life, he was devoid of all real emotion and that was what made him different from himself.

He also remembered Allison's arrow soaring through the air and piercing the Oni right in the chest, rays of light were pouring out of it from where the arrow hit and everyone was watching in astonishment, as Allison was the first to actually kill any of the Oni. Then it all happened in slow motion, or at least it felt that way. The Oni materialized next to her out of thin air and before Stiles could even call out to her, the sword was already in her stomach, and the world seemed to stand still. Isaac, Kira, and Kira's mother were all watching with sadness and shock mixed in their eyes. Somewhere in the back of his mind Stiles could hear Lydia's scream that sounded more like a howl of pain that signified, yes, Allison was if fact dying. The sight of the sword being pulled out of her was more sickening than the sight of it going in and the Oni were gone as quickly as they came. Stiles ran to Allison as she started falling to her knees and he caught her in his arms, of all the pain he had been feeling since the Nogitsune left him, all the times he had made peace with dying since then because of all the people he had hurt, nothing compared to the pain he felt right now, holding Allison in his arms and watching her die. It was Allison who had been his friend, who he had fallen for over time, who he had loved and never actually told her, and now it was all gone.

She was too bright and beautiful, too kind and brave. Allison may not have been the direct target, he couldn't remember seeing anything in the Nogitsune's mind that indicated that while they were still one, but he knew what pain her death would cause _everyone_. But he was gone now, and Stiles didn't care where he went, all he cared about was the girl who was dying in his arms, gasping for air and trying to focus on the person who was holding her. Stiles looked down at her and wiped some of her hair out of her face; she smiled a bit when she realized it was him holding her. Stiles tried to move her hand to see the wound, he wanted to lie and tell her she would be fine, he wanted to promise that he was going to get her out of here alive, but he saw the blood pouring out in buckets and he knew he would be lying more for his own benefit than hers.

"Stiles." She croaked out. Stiles looked back up at her face and could see the blood making its way into her mouth now, she didn't have long, a minute at the most.

"Just – just hold on, okay? Don't go." Stiles said, he could feel tears stinging his eyes now. "Just wait, Scott's coming. Maybe he can fix you, he could try something, and he could bite you and save you." Stiles was trying to run through a million different scenarios now where she could be saved, but he knew he was trying to cope. The bite could only work on so much; Allison would be beyond the bites help by the time Scott and Lydia showed up.

"No," Allison said and Stiles felt her hand cup his cheek now, her fingers were already turning to ice but she was still reaching out for him. "It's okay Stiles, I'm okay. It doesn't hurt."

"That's not okay!" Stiles didn't realize he shouted until it had happened, all his emotions were on the verge of pouring out now, but Allison still just smiled up at him. He tried to memorize her brown eyes because he knew it would be the last time he'd ever see them for the rest of his life, no matter how short or long it may end up being. In that moment though, he didn't want to live, not without her. If someone like Allison didn't get the chance to live, then what hope was there for everyone else?

"It's okay." She repeated. "Because now I get to tell you, I love you Stiles. I – I never got the chance before, to say it, but now," She tried to smile a bit bigger and Stiles could see the blood staining her teeth now. "I love you, I always have, I always will."

"I love you too Allison." Stiles was crying now, there was no point in stopping it or trying to hold it back, he loved her. He wasn't going to spend his last moments with her trying to hold something back; he was going to tell her. "I've loved you for a really long time. I should have told you sooner, I should have let you know everyday that I loved you."

"I knew." Allison said as her cold hand fell from his face now, but then fear crossed her peaceful features.

"Allison!" Stiles panicked.

"You have to tell my dad!" She said frantically. "You have to tell him, he has to know. And Scott, and Lydia…Lydia." She had some tears forming in her eyes now and Stiles wiped them away.

"I'll tell them. I promise. I'll tell them all that you love them." Stiles promised her, and peace came across her face again, knowing that everyone she cared about would know now how she felt. "Don't leave me Allison, don't leave any of us." Stiles pleaded one last time.

"Wish I could stay." Allison smiled. "Don't forget about me Stiles Stilinski."

"I could never forget you Allison Argent, not even if I tried." Stiles said.

He gave her one last kiss and she gave him one last smile before the light left her eyes and they closed forever. Stiles kissed her forehead and buried his face in her hair. The smell of cherry blossoms was now masked over with the stench of blood, making it all too real now that Allison was gone forever, that she was never coming back. He started sobbing sometime after he looked down at Allison again, all his pain was pouring out, the anger he felt at himself for not stopping it, for feeling like he didn't even try. He felt as if he should have seen it coming, that the Nogitsune would try to take someone he loved from him. Stiles just always thought that it would be his dad or Scott first, but he never thought Allison would end up in the line of fire. She was the hunter, the fighter, and maybe to a certain point Stiles thought her invincible because of these things. But in the end she was only human; not a werewolf, or kanima, or banshee, not a kitsune and certainly not an Oni. She was just Allison Argent, a girl who had gotten caught up in this mess just as he had so long ago, and now she was gone.

Stiles didn't know when Mr. Argent had shown up at the scene, he didn't know if he heard Allison's last words or if he had seen her get hurt. But perhaps the hardest thing he saw that night after Allison was gone was when he saw Mr. Argent, one of the toughest men he ever knew, fall to his knees and just stare at his daughter's lifeless body, clutched in Stiles' arms.

* * *

Stiles was numb at Allison's funeral, at least until everyone started talking about her. How she had been so bright and full of life, how she was the toughest girl they ever had the pleasure of knowing, how she was the best friend anyone could ask for, how wonderful of a daughter she had been and would always be. But when it was Stiles' turn to speak, he couldn't, no words came to mind and he couldn't even bring himself to read what he had written down. He just cried all the tears he'd been holding in. Scott had come up almost right away and led Stiles back to his seat, at some point Lydia held his hand and rested her head on his shoulder and she was crying too.

Her burial was just as somber and Stiles still couldn't say a word, too afraid to break again as he had earlier. He just watched them lower the woman he loved down into the ground in her casket forever. He had come back to her grave the next day and nearly every day after that. When he wasn't there, he was curled up in his bed at home, too numb to everything else. Stiles still felt his pain from the Nogitsune, but compared to his broken heart it was just a paper cut now. Those days he would swear he could still hear Allison's voice, or catch glimpses of her out of the corner of his eyes. Scott would come over, sometimes Stiles could see that he was numb too and just trying to be strong for his best friend. They would watch some mindless movie that didn't mean much or play a couple of video games if only to keep their minds busy for a few hours, but it was never really enough. Lydia would come over and be focused on trying to find the Nogitsune, Stiles would notice that sometimes she was just as determined as Mr. Argent, wanting to make the things that took Allison away pay for what they had done. Her theories would keep him busy, sometimes thinking about catching them would make him feel better too, but then sleep would come on those nights and all the pain he had pushed away would return. His father tried to talk to him about cases at work on the better nights, to give him something he used to love hearing about to occupy his thoughts again. On the bad nights he would try to get him to talk about Allison, what he was feeling right now because that was all he knew to do for him. He loved that his friends and father tried, and he knew there would come a day where he could wake up and be happy, but that wasn't going to happen soon, not for a long while.

It had been a month and Stiles was back at her grave, staring at those words etched into her stone, and they seemed so lacking to him now. She was more than a friend and a daughter, but that was how people would remember her who didn't know her. They would come by here and see her name out of hundreds, they would see she was young when she died and they would think it was tragic because the young dying was always tragic. But Allison Argent was not a tragic sob story, she was so much more. She was a best friend to Lydia, almost like a sister in some ways, and now Lydia had lost that. Allison was not just her friend, she was so much more, that word forever on her stone almost seemed criminal now. Allison had been Scott's first love and he had been hers, yes they had broken up, but they would always be there in each other's hearts, which was the way first love worked. She was Chris Argent's _only_ daughter, she had been his pride and joy and after Allison's mother died, it was just them against the world. Now what did he have left? Kate was dead, Victoria was dead, Gerard was incapacitated somewhere but he didn't mean much anymore. His family was gone now, all he had left was hunting down the things that had taken his daughter from him.

To Stiles, Allison had been his first love. While he may not have been hers, she was his and for Stiles, that was more than enough. He remembered when Lydia first told him that Allison thought he was cute, he thought it was some sort of cruel joke back then because her and Scott were supposed to be in love, or had been, but they were broken apart then. He'd hung out with Allison, she laughed at his cheesy jokes, and somewhere along the way he felt something tug at his heartstrings. It was great, but then guilt set in, she had been with Scott, they were supposed to have this epic romance, and here he was stepping in. Stiles remembered telling Scott, it felt more like a confessional because of all the guilt he felt. But Scott was a good guy, always had been and always will be, and by the end of it all he was smiling an ear-to-ear smile and said "Go get her." He remembered asking Allison out on a date and him fumbling along the way, he remembered her laughter and agreement, and he remembered how stunning she looked in that black dress that night. Stiles could still hear Mr. Argent's speech echoing in his thoughts, threatening him that if he ever hurt Allison he would hunt him down like any other creature he'd ever hunted. For a good long while he was terrified of Mr. Argent, but then as he and Allison became closer, it seemed that Mr. Argent began to approve of him and Allison, he still remembers the fear he felt when Mr. Argent asked him to go target shooting, thinking that he was going to be the target. In the end, they just went out shooting at targets set up far away from them and that was the first genuine time Stiles had made Mr. Argent laugh.

Then he remembered that last night he had with Allison, the last night he was himself before the Nogitsune left him finally. He should have told her then that he loved her, but there was so much more emotion than that passing through them, the word "love" felt almost like it wasn't enough in that moment. The last memory he always had was when Allison told him that she loved him, with that look of being at peace on her face though she was dying, he remembered that flicker of joy he saw when he said he loved her too. That moment, despite it's horror and sorrow, was a perfect one, because at that moment those words felt right, they spoke volumes and they were what they other so desperately needed and wanted to hear.

"I don't know if you can hear me," Stiles started, staring at her grave and sitting down in the grass now that had grown over the dirt. "But Allison, I really hate this tombstone. It should be a skyscraper really, listing all the words that need to be said about you, that should be remembered. People are going to think you were a tragedy a hundred years from now when they look at this thing, but you weren't. You were a sister, a daughter, a friend, a lover, a fighter, and so much more. You deserved so much more than all of this." Stiles felt a few tears fall now, but he just brushed them away because he was finally saying what he wanted to say so long ago. "I loved you from the moment I got to know you. It was different back then, a friend kind of love, but it was love. I still remember when it changed. I don't know when it changed for you, but it was when I got you to watch the first Terminator movie with me and…you did that horrible impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger, we both laughed until we could barely breathe. Then it was like I just saw a different you, like everything shifted, and I fell in love. I should have told you then, I should have told you when we had our first date, there were so many other days I wished I could have told you so you would know how much I cared. How I thought about you every single day and just wanted to be with you every minute. I didn't really know it was love though until we had our first kiss. Then I felt it. And god, I still wish you were here, because it's just not fair. I know the world isn't fair and it sucks a good part of the time, but if someone as good as you can't make it in this world, what's the point for the rest of us? I just…I would say I'd trade places with you, but I wouldn't want you to live with this pain. Do people think of that when they say that? Do they think of the pain the dead would feel if we traded places? I don't think it crosses out minds much, because all that would really matter is that you'd be alive, and you deserve to live Allison, you really do. I guess I would trade places, but I'd want you to really live, not just exist. I know you're probably trying to tell me the same thing right about now, and I promise one day I will, you know I don't break my promises to you. But right now…right now I think I'm fine right here. Remembering you. How beautiful your smile was, how you're eyes were so bright when you were happy, how you smelled like cherry blossoms, and how slightly terrifying you were sometimes with that bow. I love you Allison Argent, and I miss you everyday. I still wish you hadn't left, but I know that wherever you are…you're okay, and someday everyone else will be too."

Stiles felt the weight of the world shift off of him then, and he spent the rest of the afternoon in silence there, by her grave under the tree. When the sun started to set he began to rise to his feet to leave, and before he could take a step away, he smelled the familiar scent of cheery blossoms in the wind and he just _knew_ Allison was there in that moment, and she was happy. Stiles smiled down at Allison's tombstone and wiped tears from his eyes again before he turned and left for the day.


End file.
